USA Chat Rooms

Anastasia
Matchmaker, Dating Coach and Manager

USA Chat Rooms

     Since chat rooms started in the late 1980’s they have revolutionized the creation of connections, friendships, and romantic relationships. They provided people with the opportunity to talk to others who live far away. On a dating site with chat rooms, you can chat with people from the next street, town, city, state, and even from other countries! Over the years chat rooms have developed a great deal, giving users the chance to share photographs and create profiles (see more information on these features below!). The online world can be an alien one for some people who are concerned about the legitimacy of the internet. Yes, it is true there have been times when the internet and online chat rooms have been used for inappropriate activities but at our website, we do all we can to ensure you have the best, most secure experience possible!

Now, some of you out there in the beautiful United States of America might be asking just what exactly is a chat room. Well, the answer is simple and easy. A chat room is just like a normal conversation but you are not in the same room. Think of it as a phone call with typed messages. A chat room is like text messaging but you are both there at the same time, you receive the messages instantly and respond. You can also send each other pictures and get to know each other well before you attempt meeting in person. Chat rooms allow you to establish a connection with someone whom you cannot meet in person (at least not straight away!).

On this page, we will tell you a little bit more about our USA chat rooms. We will talk about what you should and should not do, rules around photos, the best and worst topics of conversations, those all-important questions, and how to stay safe online. First, we will talk about the best ways to start an online chat in our USA chat rooms.

How to Start a Conversation in our USA Chat Rooms?

     Some of this will depend on whether you are from the United States or not. You may, if you are not from the States, have the impression that all American people are confident and secure in themselves. This is not the case and so you will need to think carefully about how you start your conversations. Remember, first impressions count for everything so you need to make sure you catch their interest straight away! Here are just a few ideas of how to strike up the perfect conversation without scaring the other person away, boring them into not replying, or downright confusing them. If you start with a plain “Hi” or “Hello, how are you?” it is a risky business. You could be lucky and come across a person who is happy to respond as it feels like a ‘normal’ conversation. However, many people may feel this lacks effort or thought. 

  • Be specific with your opening question or comment. You could begin with phrases like “I notice that” or “You mentioned in your profile that..”. This shows that you have taken the time to look at their profile and find out a little about them before attempting to start a conversation. If they mention they like to travel, and you do too, you could ask where their dream destination is. This will show you are genuinely interested. This thoughtful approach is more likely to get you a response.
  • Would you rather ask questions, when clean and interesting, are perfect conversation starters as they will cause some thought on their part and are a creative way to get to know someone? You could ask questions like “Would you rather be able to read minds or turn invisible?”, “Would you rather have all the money in the world or all the time in the world?” or “Would you rather have fingers for toes or toes for fingers”...okay, that last one is just for fun. These are interesting, thought-provoking, and, sometimes, funny. You are almost guaranteed to get a response as they are great icebreakers.
  • Ask a general, open-ended question. These offer more chances for a conversation where you can get a better sense of what the other person is really like. Your first question could be as broad as “How is your life going right now?”. This can give you a lot of information while ensuring the other person can answer without feeling too much pressure. There is also the hope that they will respond with similar, open-ended questions and, before you know it, you have yourself a conversation that is flowing naturally. However, exercise caution if they only talk about themselves and don’t ask you anything, this is a red flag!
  • Deep questioning. This can become quite complicated but could be a good way to start your conversation. You may want to jump straight in with a deep question such as “What is the most meaningful thing to happen to you in your life so far?” or “What would you say is your biggest success in life?”. The response you get could be flippant or sincere but it will give you a good measure of the person. Just be careful, some Americans do not like to feel pressured into giving information like this straight away.  

These are just a couple of ideas. You can always use her photo to inspire your first message. Making your first message feel like a normal question, such as asking about what film to watch, could make the other person feel more at ease. They can respond in a humorous fashion or give a serious response. Either way, you have a response and it is something you can build on. Make sure you give your first message some thought and remember these tips:

  • Be respectful: you must treat the other person the same way online as you would in ‘the real world’. Be polite, listen, and respond accordingly. We would say that respect is the number one factor to keep in mind when chatting to anyone online.
  • No rude jokes: Keep it clean, this includes photos, jokes, and comments. If you are rude, whether as a joke or not, you are likely to lose the other person as they will feel you do not respect them. 
  • Make it interesting: A bored person is a person who walks away from your conversations. You need to keep their interest by asking insightful, open questions and listening carefully. Demonstrate that you have listened through making relevant comments, and asking questions relating to previous conversations or what you see in their profile.
  • Make it relevant: don’t focus on the past or comment on something completely irrelevant. They need to know that you are interested in them and not clutching at straws. 

These are just a few tips regarding your first message and any messages after that. If you want your conversations to go well and to form long-lasting relationships (of any kind) you need to make sure you follow these guidelines. The slightest wrong word, comment, or question could cause you to lose a person of interest!

What Photos Should Be on a Dating Profile?

Do’s Donts
✅ Your profile pictures will probably be the first thing the other person looks at, either when you message them or when they are looking for someone to communicate with. Make sure your photos are as high a quality as possible and very clear. It is also a good idea if one of the photos is a full portrait of you, smiling and make sure it is recent. You want to show you are not hiding anything and this also gives the other person an idea of your physical appearance. ❌ Selfies. Now this is a bit of a tricky one because some selfies will be completely fine. However, if you post a selfie of you drunk/ drinking alcohol, smoking, or surrounded by food it does not necessarily put you in a good light. If we take smoking as an example. A non-smoker may immediately be put off talking to you if they see a cigarette in your photo and therefore do not want to communicate with you.
✅ Doing something you love: These pictures are always fantastic as they give an insight into your hobbies and interests. If you love going to the theatre or art exhibition then post a photo of you outside the theatre or looking through the artwork at your favourite exhibition. Again, these photos demonstrate you are a real person and give the other person a potential topic of conversation. They could also show the other person what you (potentially) are like as a person. For example, if you are standing looking at a Van Gogh picture the other person will assume you are an art enthusiast, possibly arty yourself, and that you have a good knowledge of this area. Just make sure the picture is legitimate and not you trying to look a certain way! ❌ You never want to look superficial or that you are trying to show off your wealth. You should never post or send photos of you standing in front of expensive cars, hotels, money, or being hugged by a group of women. These things do not make you attractive or interesting. They will actually deter most people from talking to you for a few reasons. The primary reason is that they will think you are superficial and that all you care about is money and showing off or you are lying and using these pictures to trick others. These sorts of photos will only attract the wrong sort of people, those who are out to profit at your expense!
✅ Show your active lifestyle: If you love playing or watching a particular sport or enjoy going to the gym then you can show this in your picture. Now, we do not mean a photo of you flexing your muscles or showing off your abs, remember we are not being superficial! This shows the other person your interests and could spark potential questions. For example, if there is a photo of you at a football match they may ask about your favorite team or player. ❌ Semi-naked, completely naked, post-shower, or getting out of the pool is also a no. You may have a fantastic body (and good for you!) but you do not want to rush into taking your clothes off! Two things could happen here. You could possibly attract attention from someone who is only interested in your physique rather than you as a person. The other possibility is that they see you as self-obsessed or vain and be put off. Keep your clothes on!
✅ Pictures with your family or friends are always a great choice. Not only do these photos give credibility to your profile (i.e. assure the other person that you are real) but they also give an insight into your character, principles, and approach to life. ❌ Do not hide. By this, we mean no squatting or kneeling down. Make sure you are completely visible in your pictures. You shouldn’t be seen as hiding something in your pictures!

Questions in a USA Chat Room. Questions That Could Pave the Way or Ones That Could Halt Potential

      Questioning is a key part of everyday life. On average an adult asks between 25 and 30 questions every single day. So, if this is the case you want to make sure your questions count and make your experience in our USA chat rooms the best it can possibly be. This section is not just about the sort of questions you should ask, you must also consider the questions you need to avoid, also depending on whether are you chatting with a boy or a girl! Some of these questions you should avoid for the time being i.e. wait until you are in a more established relationship. Let's focus on the more appropriate questions first.

  • ✌ A simple “How are you?” is a good question as long as it is not your first message (this lacks creativity). Once you have established a connection it is important that you ask your American counterpart how they are, how their day has been etc. This sort of question shows you are interested in how they are and, as long as you respond to their answer accordingly, shows you genuinely care. Proceed with caution here though and try not to be overbearing by asking how they are repeatedly. 
  • ✌ Ask about their family. Americans tend to be very family-oriented. You can ask if they have siblings etc. but try not to be too personal. You do not want to dig too deep too soon, it will put people off. Remember, these should be general questions not too personal.
  • ✌ Ask them about their job and how their day at work went. This shows your American friend that you are interested in their life and not just the fun, sociable aspects but the everyday parts too. If you are in similar lines of work you may find common ground here and ask a question that leads to a much longer, in-depth conversation than you first thought!
  • ✌ Tell me one thing or what is one thing….questions. These are excellent, especially as an icebreaker as long as you do not attempt to be too personal and/ or rude. You can ask questions such as ‘What is one thing that made you smile today?’ or ‘What one thing could make you really happy right now’. These are excellent questions as they are thought-provoking and can be returned. However, be sure to not criticize or mock their answers as this will deter them from talking to you. Respect what they have to say no matter how silly or mundane you think it is. 

Sometimes we must remember it is not what we say or what we ask that is important but what we do not ask! There are some questions that you must avoid to ensure you do not end up in a conflict or lose people to talk with. Here are some questions to avoid if you want to make sure your conversations continue past the initial stage. 

  • ❌ Intrusive questions. While you want to find out more about the other person there is such a thing as asking too intrusive a question. By intrusive questions, we mean ones that really dig into someone else's life asking for information that they may not even tell their closest friends. Such a question could be “How much do you earn each month?”. This does not show any genuine interest in the person but delves into their personal, financial situation which they probably do not wish to share! There are however intrusive questions that can be asked but definitely not at the beginning of a conversation. You should not ask about having children, why previous relationships didn’t work etc. In the future, when you have more of a relationship (especially if this occurs offline), you can ask these sorts of questions but for now, keep them out of the conversation!
  • ❌ Sexual nature. These are definitely questions that should be avoided in our USA chat rooms. You cannot ask about preferences in the bedroom etc. as this will put the other person off from talking to you. People use our USA chat rooms to establish relationships based on mutual respect and trust, not sexual behavior.
  • ❌ Boring questions. Yes, you can ask how they are or how their day went but when you start asking ‘What was the weather like today?’ or ‘What did you eat for lunch?’ It can get a little boring. Try to avoid too many of these questions as they may get bored of them easily!

These are just a couple of ideas. Just like in real life, if you think you should not ask a question it is probably best you don’t!

Hot Topics or Topics to Cause a Freeze Out?

When we talk with close friends or family it is generally okay to discuss most topics. You may not disagree but have established relationships that cannot be broken by disagreeing on something. However, in a chat room, this is not the case. You must know your audience and know them well when it comes to certain topics. You will want to find out more about the other person but make sure your insightful questioning does not feel like an interview, there is nothing worse than wanting a chat with a friendly person but feeling like you are being grilled! You must also remember that anything you share about your life needs to be interesting and relevant to the conversation. Here are a few good topics to talk about in our USA chat rooms. 

Dos and Donts Chat Conversation Topics

Do’s Donts
⏩ Ask questions about the events of the day/ week. These are open and interesting and they are likely to respond in a similar way. Do not just ask ‘How was work?’. You can be more interesting, ‘What one thing made you happy at work today?’A story from your day/ week. You could ask for advice as a way to get them to relax into the conversation by offering you support. Don’t be rude. Rude comments or jokes are surefire ways to make them disconnect. Asking them what size they wear or telling a lude joke is a definite no!
⏩ Discuss your, and their, plans for the upcoming weekend. After a while of chatting these could turn to joint plans, if you both live in the USA. Don’t be too direct, especially in the beginning! Asking who they voted for, how much money they make, or if they had a Covid-19 jab is a bit too forward. These questions can come in time or if the topic of conversation lends itself to asking these questions. Our USA members will probably have strong political views, and you may or may not agree. You do not want to ruin a potential relationship when your political views can be discussed, and more likely respected, later on.
⏩ Memories or funny stories from your childhood. These could invoke questions or encourage them to talk about their childhood. Connections could be made here and/ or this could help the conversation stay flowing. Something random! This could depend on your interests but talk about a new recipe, the weather (but not for long), new jokes, films, music, news (not politics….not yet!), or any new exercises you should try. This ‘normal’ conversation is the best way to make a connection but make sure it does not become too boring! Don’t be boring. Questions like ‘Do you like films?’ or ‘Do you like listening to music?’ will give you one of two responses….yes or no. Yawn! Keep it interesting or lose the other person!
⏩ You’ve read their profile or have chatted for a bit already, discussing common interests and hobbies is the perfect way to get to know someone while discussing something familiar for both of you. You can share experiences or ask for advice which will keep the conversation flowing. What did you do today? Yikes! Is your online date a child that has been to school or your pet you lovingly talk to when you get home? No! This question is boring and will invoke a boring response…if you get one! Change it up with “Tell me one thing that made you smile today”.

After a while of chatting with the other person, you will learn what makes them tick, what to avoid, and how best to approach them. They will also learn this about you! Just make sure not to ruin it in the beginning by discussing the wrong thing. 

Staying Safe

Staying safe online is just as important as staying safe in the real world. We do our very best to make sure our USA chat room is as safe as possible and will support you in any way we can. However, you can make sure you do not share personal information (bank details, home addresses etc.) which could be used inappropriately. We will do our best to ensure these sorts of people are not on our site! Make sure to only share information you are happy with that cannot be used negatively towards you. We will keep you safe and ensure that fake profiles cannot be made or are caught ASAP! Do not worry and enjoy our USA chat rooms!